Reclaiming Intimacy in Your Relationship
You can love your partner deeply and still feel lonely in your relationship. Maybe you miss flirting, feeling wanted, or having a conversation that goes deeper than who’s picking up the kids.
Between work, parenting, and the day-to-day demands of life, romance, sex, and emotional closeness can gradually fall off the radar.
Or maybe, when you think about it, intimacy has never quite felt the way you hoped it would. You may have different levels of desire or feel anxious about sex. Past experiences, including trauma, may make it hard to feel present or at ease. Sometimes you’ve spent years guessing what your partner wants because neither of you knows how to bring it up.
How we begin
Talking about sex and intimacy can feel vulnerable, even with someone you’ve loved for years. Helping people begin to explore this part of their lives again is some of my favorite work as a psychologist.
Whether you come on your own or with your partner, we’ll start by looking at the patterns that have developed over time, with curiosity and without blame. Maybe one of you stopped initiating after feeling turned down, while the other started to tense up at affectionate touch because it seemed to come with an expectation. Once we understand what those moments have come to mean, we can begin to untangle the hurt, confusion, or avoidance that’s built up around them.
Together, we’ll make a plan that fits your relationship and what you want from it. That might mean finding words for something you’ve been afraid to say, making room for affection without pressure, or rediscovering what feels playful and pleasurable. We’ll go at a pace that gives you room to notice what you want and talk about it honestly.